The end of June, when the sunsets were blazing, our friendship bloomed from a separate mistake

Four hours of non-stop conversation;

of me pouring my heart out, telling you things I never would've thought of saying

Into the wee hours, you listened from 10 kilometres away, while I rested under the lights

Sleepy eyes, the both of us, the next morning

I felt so thankful

The start of July, we sat under the stars together for the first time

and we talked about what, I can't remember, but

I felt so thankful

Since then so many images of sunrises, sunsets and of your face have surfaced

Late August, I'd say the peak of this short-lived journey

Though my spirits have been dampened by the downpour in June,

the breeze in August took the smog with it

We ate, we laughed, we sang

and  _   _ _ _ _ _

I felt so thankful

Then one night, under the stars once again

You told me a heart-shattering tale in an ironically cool and calm manner

Your words caught my tongue and I didn't know what to say or what to do

I felt so thankful

your attempts to said goodbye had failed

and you were sitting right there in front of me

What you said reaffirmed how important you were to my life

and how much I loved and needed you

What would I have done at my lowest points?

I felt so thankful

for you

That was when I bought Alfred

Then the storms of mid-September came

Neither of us was ready for them

We were caught up by other schoolwork, other friends, other other things

but each other

We spent less time together and I cannot say I wasn't disappointed

We became more and more wary of each other's words

We fought.

We talked less

I thought more

I started staying up late looking through old pictures we took together

They brought me so much joy at first

Then I realised they were all in the past

Same with old conversations

I went through one year's worth of chitchat between us

and apparently so much has changed

The frequent 'how's the day' has turned into us apologising every odd day

Haha

The way you speak sometimes — aloof and cold

It never fazed me up until recently

Even more recently I've learnt to swallow my voice just to keep them from your ears

I'm sorry but I'm tired

I'm tired of trying and trying again to no avail

I'm tired of crying

Perhaps it's my fault this ship is sinking

Perhaps it's just life with its turn of events

Perhaps we're both too obsessed with the idea of recreating moments and we haven't learnt that it's impossible to do so

I'm sorry, perhaps I'm just taking the easy way out

 Now I have no one to call on Saturday nights

Now I have no one to sing with under the stars
Now I have no shelter in the rain 

Now I have lost my best friend

(were we best friends?)

We've hurt each other

We've shared bits of our lives with each other

We've been there for each other

We've made full use out of each other,

I've given and received, you too, have

Now our expiration date has been stamped on;

like transaction time stamps on a passbook

it's running out of space

This three-month short transaction has got to end

it's taking a toll on us